Tag Archives: friends

Thankful For So Much

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When I was growing up, I wasn’t the biggest fan of Thanksgiving. I was a picky eater. I focused on the fact that I didn’t like the food. If you don’t really like vegetables and you’re not into turkey, good old T-giving can be a tough day. But as I’ve grown older, I’ve realized what an incredible day it really is. I’m happy to say that now that I consider myself quite the foodie, I absolutely love all the delicious food I get to stuff my face with BUT I love even more to have a day that’s specifically dedicated to giving thanks. It’s a day focused on being grateful for all you have and to be with those you love and reflect on all that you have together.

Since being diagnosed, I have found true strength when I count my blessings. When I consciously think about all the things that I do have in life, no matter how hard the day, my mindset is always helped. It helps ground me and helps put things into a necessary perspective. So today in honor of this amazing day that is completely dedicated to being thankful, I am going to list out everything I feel so lucky to have in my life.

I am thankful for…

  1. My Michael
  2. My family
  3. My Phoebe
  4. My friends
  5. My incredible doctors (especially Dr. Mandy & Dr. D)
  6. The most amazing and caring nurses (especially Andrea, Rachel, Margo, Deb, Kristen!)
  7. To be a patient at the most amazing cancer institute in the world— Dana Farer
  8. To have a job
  9. Having a roof over my head
  10. Having food to eat everyday
  11. Being an American
  12. Living in New England
  13. Being a Patriots Fan
  14. Being able to practice yoga
  15. Sharing a home I love with a person I love
  16. Music!!!
  17. My under desk bicycle
  18. Having a safe car
  19. Dancing
  20. Technology
  21. Fresh flowers
  22. Queen B
  23. T-Swift, in particular, “Shake It Off”
  24. One Direction
  25. Buddhism
  26. The ability to opening my mind to alternative ways of thinking
  27. Clothes & Shoes that I love
  28. A working pancreas
  29. Good food and being able to eat it!
  30. Buffalo chicken
  31. Strawberry strudels
  32. Being in remission
  33. Having hair again
  34. Soft, fuzzy pajamas
  35. Last but certainly not least, I am thankful for this blog and most importantly thankful for all the supportive and wonderful people that have followed my journey. I’m thankful that you’re part of my life and thankful for everything your support has provided me throughout a challenging portion of my life.

I hope you all have a beautiful day, and remember to truly give thanks to all that you have in your life. Even if you’re going through a tough time, try to think of at least one thing that you can feel true gratitude for — whether that is as important as another human being in your life or as simple as being able to have a glass of wine. Whatever it is you’re thankful for, be truly thankful, down to your core.

Happy Thanksgiving, loves!

thankful

Lots of love & light,

Jessy

Pup-ternity

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Yesterday, I packed up my HomeGoods Happy desk and walked out the TJX doors for the last time. When I got in the car, Roar by Katy Perry was playing on the radio and the moment almost didn’t feel real. I haven’t had the most ideal time since returning in January but I am still thankful for the years that I spent there as I learned a lot about marketing and even more about myself. Most importantly, I met some wonderful individuals. Some that I know our bonds will last far beyond the TJX walls. 

I had just gotten “associate of the quarter” so lucky for my co-workers, my mug will be up in the cafe for a little bit longer in case they miss me. 👍🏼Mandy girl, give it a tap on water loops. 🖐🏼#missmyworkwifealready

  
SO, what’s next for me?! I’m really excited to say that I will be starting on Friday with the ALS TDI, a nonprofit in Cambridge that focuses solely on finding a cure for ALS. I will be continuing in the marketing field and (hopefully) bringing my digital expertise and ideas to the organization. I am so excited about this opportunity as my hope is that I can feel more passionate about my work and know that I am contributing to something that really matters. Hopefully, the work I do will help make a difference in people’s lives. It’s a BIG change from what I’ve done in the past but change is always a good thing and I have a feeling this is a good thing. 

But before I begin with the new company, I get a three day pup-ternity. Yup, that’s right. Three blissful days as a stay-at-home-pup-mom. I’ve waited, literally, years for this little fur baby to come home so I can barely believe that she’s actually sitting on my lap as I write this post! Mike and I picked Miss Phoebe up Friday and it was one of the most exciting moments of my life. She already is bringing us so much joy and even more snuggles!

   
    
    
    
    
 
Is she not the cutest little thing in the world? 

On my to-do list today was clean the house, organize my clothes, do some errands, workout, do yoga, get some paperwork done and play with Phoebe. Here’s what I checked off the list: played with Phoebe. I am writing this, still in my pajamas, snuggled on the couch with my little angel and so the fact that I got “nothing” done today is okay. You don’t get too many days like this and so I’m smiling thinking about the mommy and fur baby bonding day we got to have. With the risk of sounding self-indulgent, I’d say I deserve it. 

   
 
Lastly, I want to say thank you to everybody who’s been so kind and supportive to me over the past (almost) 2 years. Being able to move on from TJX and also become a pup mom is a big step for me and I couldn’t have done it without the support I’ve felt from the many many incredible people in my life. 

Lots of love, light & puppy kisses,

Jessy 

Fall Fiesta

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When it’s cold outside, and we’ve been cooped up inside for days, remind me of days like this…

When I woke up and headed to a corn maze with three of my favorite people in the world.  And sipped on delicious hot apple cider.  

And then picked pumpkins that we’ll carve into jack-o-lanterns and continued to use my selfie stick to capture the moments (best purchase ever, no shame here). 

    
 And then came home and thought, what better day to go for a run!? So I strapped on my yoga pants and sneakers and headed down to the good old Mystic River in Somerville. I decided to take a new route and found a great, long path right along the water. I feel so happy when I’m near the water, doesn’t matter what kind, even if I have the highway to my left, as long as I have the river to my right, I feel a little more at peace than typical. And then as I continued to run I came along a three story lookout tower that I marched right up, did some sun salutations, looked out onto the Boston skyline that I love so much, felt the sunshine on my face and felt so grateful for the moment that was upon me. Healthy enough to be running again, strong enough to climb flights of stairs and in a good enough place mentally to be able to feel the sunshine on my face, totally alone and realize how lucky I truly am. And okay enough with myself to laugh at how crazy my hair has become. 

   
   
Then I picked up some fall essentials to decorate our front steps, because honestly a decorated house is a happy house. And a happy house is a happy me. 

   
 
Now I’m sitting in my Brady jersey & sweat pants, with pulled pork on the oven (thanks to the best boyfriend in America), and a good old O’Doules in hand with my snuggley guy. 

  
Fall is a special time of the year in New England. 

Life is good today. 

Remind me of this day in January. 

Lots of love & light,

Jessy 

The Happiness Struggle is REAL

Posted in Health & Wellness, My Stories by

What a difference 36 hours can make. 

I left work at 8pm on Friday, a 12 hour day. A day full of meetings, emails and reports. As I got in my car and started driving down the highway, I lost control of my emotions when I once again started thinking “what am I doing?” I cried, and cried the whole way home. I look at my diagnosis as a blessing now since I have grown so much from it and truly believe I am and will live a better, more positive life. However, the blessing that it is to so truly feel the power of “making each day count”can come as a burden as well. There’s a beauty in naive bliss. Before I was diagnosed, I was doing the same thing I’m doing now. But it seemed okay, I was striving for the weekend. Working for Friday at 5pm. Today unfortunately that doesn’t seem right to me. I don’t want to only enjoy 2 days of the week. It is an overwhelming thought– what is going to truly make me happy, AND make me money? That thought got me so worked up to the point that I was shaking, yelling, saying “eff this shit” as I angrily drove home. When I walked in the door, my face was all puffy from crying and I let Mike have it. And as always, he was there for me. He took my hand and let me rant and reminded me that we would figure it out. In this moment, I wasn’t okay. I think in our society it’s almost taboo to say you’re “not doing so great” when someone asks you how you are? I’m guilty of it. Even when I’m not fine, I always say I’m doing really good. But here it is– sometimes I’m not good. Sometimes I’m not happy. Sometimes I’m anxious. Sometimes I’m angry. Sometimes I’m just not feeling it. And I think that’s okay. I think we should all feel more empowered to say how we actually feel more often. Life isn’t perfect and admitting that you’re day or week hasn’t been so good doesn’t mean that you’re ungrateful but you’re simply being truthful to yourself and others at that time.

But I started this blog with, “what a difference 36 hours can make.” And it can. This became a weekend full of activities and it was exactly what I needed. I needed to focus on being physical, getting out my frustration, and centering my mind to be in a more positive place. 

So like every Saturday, Mike and I started our day with outdoor yoga by the most amazingly powerful woman! 

  
  
Then we cleaned the house like maniacs. There’s a part of me that enjoys a good cleaning session. I was sweating and scrubbing the tub on my hands and knees and DAMN did it feel good when I got it looking shiny white. 

Then it was night and I headed to the Gorham Mansion in Waltham for a nighttime, blacklight yoga session underneath the stars. I was by myself, which I was nervous about, but I did it and it felt great. Looking up to the open sky and feeling the cool breeze on my face was rejuvinating and revitalizing. 

   
   
And FINALLY! Me and my Jessie woke our bums up EARLY today and got to Burlington by 715 in the morning to do a 5K with color paint/powder being thrown all over us. It was wild and way more fun than I had expected. Plus, we ran the whole time which I was super proud of us about! Being silly with your girlfriend while getting a workout in, LOVE that combination! 

   
    
  
Net net of this random blog post is to always try to remember that tomorrow can be better and that you have the choice to make it better. Maybe if I had brought that thought to the forefront on Friday, I would have had a more enjoyable ride home 😢🙈

I hope you all found a piece of happiness, fun and rejuvenation on this weekend. 

Lots of love & light,

Jessy 

Another Angel

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Yesterday my best friend Brittany’s Meme passed away. Yesterday I was reminded, yet again, of the importance of remembering that each day with those we love is a gift. Yesterday I was reminded of how beautiful and important friendships can be.
Brittany is more than a best friend, she’s a sister. I met Brittany when we were 5 years old in kindergarten and she asked me for my fruit roll-up. A rarity in my household, I swiftly denied trading for whatever snack she had. Since that moment, we’ve been by each other’s side. Throughout my childhood, The Piet’s, were my second family. I had a trundle bed in Britt’s room as I slept there so often. I went on almost every family camping trip and even a family trip to Disney when we were 16. I was at holiday’s and parties. Sometimes, to Mr. & Mrs. Piet, it probably felt like I was there more than I was my own home!! They already have four girls, but they opened their home to me and made me their 5th daughter. And that love was not just with her immediate family, but with her extended family as well. I gained aunts, uncles, cousins and two amazing grandmothers. How lucky I was to have this extended family in my life. My own family and grandparents are incredible enough, then I got blessed with this second set of family as well!
brittpicthenandnow

Meme was kind, gentle and full of love. Her smile was one that would wrap around you like a bear hug (that is, if she wasn’t giving you an actual bear hug!) She was truly a beautiful soul here on this earth and I know she will continue to be one eternally. Most of all, her family was her everything and I am so grateful that I was able to be an honorary member of that family.

I will forever remember her sweet eyes, lively laugh, caring nature and sweet demeanor.

meme

To my Piet family, I can’t thank you enough for making me part of your family and allowing me to have known this remarkable woman. I am here for you and I love you all from the bottom of my heart.

All my love,

Jessy

American Ninja Warriors 

Posted in My Stories, Uncategorized by

A year ago, my little body was starting to shut down a bit when it came to my pancreas and liver. I was sitting in a hospital room, hooked up on so many pain meds, being flushed with so much fluids, I was unable to not only get out of bed but unable to move myself up or down without the help of others. This would happen time and time again until February 2015 (knock on wood, it never happens again). During these bouts, I would end up having to use walkers, canes and go through physical therapy to “learn” how to walk again. But my body is strong and I’ve learned that so is my mind. With a good attitude and determination, you can do just about anything. 

So yesterday, I completed a 5K race with three of my favorite people in the world. I certainly didn’t run the whole time, but I had a blast and did the best I could do. The greatest part of this race? 10 inflatable obstacles to throw yourself into, bounce and slide down. I pretended I was an American Ninja (princess) warrior and laughed my ass off the entire time. Laughing is the best ab workout, anyways right? 

 How grateful I feel to be strong enough to complete a physical challenge like this. 🙏🏼   

 
   
 Happy Sunday, loves! Enjoy your day. 

XOXO, 

Jessy 

Days full of sunshine & happiness 

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Well, what a 6 days it was. It has been two years since Mike and I stayed in Portland and it was that trip that we “discovered” Peaks Island….  
That weekend was really special, not for any reason other than the fact that we got to relax and explore a new place together. The day we spent on Peaks Island, biking around the small village, looking at the beautiful ocean views off the cliffs and watching ferry boats come in and out as we ate and drank beers, is one of my all-time favorite days ever. During difficult and painful procedures throughout the past year, the doctors or nurses would tell me to try to relax and imagine I was in my favorite place in the world. Every time, I found myself on Peaks with my Michael. This unplanned, quick visit of a small island on the outskirts of Maine has brought me so much peace of mind and strength when I’ve needed it most. So to be healthy enough to be back there, with Mike, was magical. What’s more magical is that this trip was made possible because of the kindness and generosity of other people. Because a group of team members at HomeGoods started a pool last year and made me this beautiful booklet (that’s what happens when you have an incredibly talented art director heading up the project) to explain that they wanted me to “go back to peaks” for some rest and relaxation to make up for our cancelled Domincan trip in March 2014. This is from a team, I actually no longer get to work with at TJX, as I had been transferred to our Marmaxx division before getting diagnosed. But they came together to do something out of the kindness of their hearts just to make me smile. How lucky am I? These are the people who will ALWAYS be my TJX work family because they truly care about me as a human and not a number or just another employee. It’s a true blessing to have this type of connection and bond with people at work, so although I do not get to work with them regularly anymore, I will always be grateful of the relationships I was able to cultivate during my time with the most fabulous brand in all the land, HomeGoods.

With all that said, I want to share a few pictures with you all of our much-needed days away in Maine.

It started with a lake house with friends on Friday…

   
 
Then we headed to the beach near Portland where we went for long walks during the day and stayed at the Portland Harbor Hotel at night. I treated myself to a bath for FOUR days in a row. How much more relaxed does it get than that?! We ate at some of the most delicious restaurants, including Holy Donut. Wow, is Portland a winner for foodies! 

   
    
    
    
 
Then we packed it up, and took the ferry over to Peaks Island and stayed in a gorgeous little Inn. We started off by renting golf carts to explore the island where we found an old war cave/gun storage thing that is now completely full of graffiti but there’s such a beauty to it. We also spent time walking on the beach and making rock castles on a cliff with about 100 other “castles.” It’s like a natural version of Jenga, so cool!

   
    
    
    
    
  

 
We spent the next day riding our bikes, laying in the beach and HORSE BACK RIDING! Something I’ve wanted to do together for so long so it was so amazing to make it a reality. 

   
    
   
    
   
   

Yesterday it was back to reality. It was back to the hospital (but my numbers all look great so there’s nothing else I could ask for). 

   
   
And today I headed back to the office. However, I’m refusing to let my outdoor adventures cease so I headed to a state park across the street from work after I got out and rented myself a paddle board which I took out for almost two hours– paddling and stopping to do yoga on the water. How amazing! Now I’m sitting on the little beach here, watching kids splash around in be water and writing this post. Looks like even work days can be transformed into good days. 

  
I hope you have had a wonderful week and just think, tomorrow is FRIYAY!!!!! F

Lots of love and light,

Jessy 

I Get By with a Little Help From My Friends

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Yesterday we were so lucky to spend some time with very close friends. They had rented a house on a lake in Maine with their family so we decided to visit and stay over before we start our mini vacation in Portland (writing this from the beach now! 😍) Anyways, while we were there, I was able to try paddle boarding which I’ve always wanted to do. So, at the before going in for dinner, I decided I wanted to take one out once more and went by myself. I started rowing and thought to myself, “wow I’m really good at this, I’m cruising.” So I continued rowing and found myself floating along the lake, completely in the moment. I kept looking up at the sky and then down at the water flowing around me and couldn’t help but feel so blessed and so thankful that I had been given this moment. I kept thinking to myself that it was about a year ago at this time that I was hit with pancreatitis and it was then that my most difficult physical troubles began. So I felt so lucky that I was strong enough now to be doing something active like this by myself. 

Time continued to go by and I continued to not have a care in the world. When I got to a certain point, I decided it was probably time to turn around. I started to switch directions. Difficultly #1. After multiple tries, I got the board turned around started rowing towards the house, which at this point was far, farrrrr out of sight. So I start paddling, as hard as I could but wasn’t moving too fast anymore. Oh well, I thought, no big deal. Then all of a sudden I see Michael paddling along in a kayak. “Rescuer #1” has arrived. He gets to me and instantly asks if I’m okay followed with “what the hell are you doing?” I’m baffled. Doesn’t he mean, what the hell is he doing? I’m fine. I’m having a great time. After telling him he can leave because I’m good on my own, he decides to stay and kayak next to me as I try to adventure back. So I go a few minutes passing a house with a family sitting on their deck. Tired, I decide to pause to take a break. As I stop, I realize I am FLYING backward; right pass the family I just passed a few minutes ago. Uh oh. Difficultly #2. So Mike says, you need help? Nope, I say. I’ve still got this. So I start paddling again and as the wind picks up, I begin to realize that I’m going at a rate of  about 1 inch a minute. Gotta change my strategy. So I sit on my board and decide that’ll help the situation. No such luck. Now Mike starts insisting that I let him help. So, begrudgingly, I say okay and we tie my paddle board to his kayak and it’s decided that he’s going to try to tow me back. Difficultly #3. I’m determined to pull my own weight so I try paddling while he is as well. Too many cooks in the kitchen. Next I decide I’m going to get in the water behind the paddle board and start kicking as I hold onto the board so he doesn’t have my weight to pull along. Difficulty #4. As that’s failing miserably, I let go of the paddle board and decide I’m just going to swim back. It takes a few minutes for him to notice that I’m swimming alongside but once he does, that doesn’t go over well. Difficultly #5. We then start arguing as he’s convinced that it’s going to either take hours for me to get back to the house, I’m going to drowned trying or at the very least “puke blood.” So as the words “my parents paid for 13 years of swimming lessons for a reason, I AM FINEEEEE” 🏊🏽 are being screamed out of my mouth, “Rescuer #2” comes up in his kayak. We’ve now both been gone for so long, everyone at the house is beginning to seriously worry. I then tell our friend Nate that I’m just swimming back and he gives me a definitive “that’s not going to work.” It’s now decided that I’m going to get in his kayak and he’s going to be able to paddle board back. So we pull over, I eat shit as I attempt to get in the kayak and then am finally successful the second try. Then, finally, all three of us find ourselves rowing back into our dock. Mission complete. 

After a while of explaining myself and apologizing, I went to an upstairs deck and laid on a hammock overlooking the lake and laughed to myself at the debauchery that had just ensued. But as I was chuckling to myself about what a disaster my original peaceful paddle boarding adventure had turned into, I also thought about how I did end up truly needing help. When Mike first arrived, I was annoyed to be honest. I felt like he was overreacting and not trusting me enough to understand that I am able to take care of myself. I was so determined to prove him wrong, and to show that I could do this on my own, we wasted a lot of time, attempting different ways that we could make it back, ways that ultimately didn’t work and made me more tired than I already was becoming. I tend to do this, in an effort to prove that I’m not weak, I over exert myself and don’t take the help when I actually need it. I’ve learned in the past year, that it’s so important to take help. Everyone needs help, we’re individuals but we can only survive by being dependent on first ourselves but then others too. I forget this often, as I did yesterday, but it was a good lesson to learn (once again) that sometimes you have to put aside your pride and just say yes when those that love you are trying to help you. That sometimes, taking the help can be the strongest thing you can do, not the weakest.

Moral of the story: be conscious of the currents. If you’re cruising down a lake the first time you’ve ever paddle boarded, instead of thinking “I’m Queen👑 of the paddle board🏄🏻,” you might wanna think, “the wind could be helping me and I may be screwed when I turn around.” Note to self: be more humble. 🙏🏼

Happy weekend friends.

Lots of love & light, 

Jessy 

  

Coming Off the Vacation High 

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Welp, vacation is officially over. It’s back to work tomorrow morning. Back to inside all day, back to meetings, back to waking up early, back to long days. Back to “reality.” I hope that one day my day-to-day “reality” is something that I’m excited about and feel good about myself doing, but for now, I’m sure you can feel my level of excitement through my words– not thrilled. 

I did, however, do a good job concentrating on the days and moments I had while I was having them. Sometimes on vacations in the past, I’ve spent too much time thinking about how much time I have left or how much work I’ll have when I’m back but if thoughts like that entered my mind, I tried to bring my thoughts to what was going on right now instead of focusing on days ahead. It makes a difference.

So now, as I have begun to stress out about the week ahead and am beginning to feel like I’m drowning in negative thoughts, it’s time for me to remember what an amazing 10 days I’ve had. 

Days full of kayaking with my love.

   
    
 
Lobster, fried clams, clam chowder and more lobster.    

    
   
Days starting with Mary Lou’s Coffee every morning. 

  
 
Fishing off the dock.    

 Playtime with my favorite puppy    

    
   
Playtime with my beautiful, crazy, hilarious, sass monster of a niece.    

    
    
 
Swimming in the amazing ocean.    

    
   
Relaxing and taking in the gorgeous scenery around us. 

  
   
And overall, just enjoying moments with my wonderful family. 

    
    
    
    
    
 
It ended today with a day celebrating our little Princess Elle, who turns 4 this Wednesday. 

  
 
What a lucky lady I am. So many memories made this past week with the people that matter most to me. Blessed would be an understatement.

XOXO,

Jessy 

Vacation Time

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I woke up on the right side of bed today, the VACATION side of the bed. Last week was quite the week and I’d be lying to say I did a good job staying positive throughout it. Everyday, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I could go on and on about what was bothering me but I don’t feel like thinking about it right now. Let’s just say I had had ENOUGH and I was ready for my vacation to start and to be away from my desk. 

It’s already been such a great few days. We started off America’s birthday party with a friend’s BBQ in Needham; great food, lawn games and fireworks to end the night…loads of fun. 

   
      
Then we packed up and headed to the Cape for our week away. My parents rented the same house as they did last year so we can spend a few days together lounging in floats, dancing on the beach, doing yoga on the dock, working on puzzles, cracking lobsters, and laughing till our bellies hurt. 

         

I’ll be back in full force next week but the next few days, I’m disconnecting from my phone and computer a bit and just relaxing and enjoying time with the sunshine and my family.

Off to Mary Lou’s for the most heavenly coffee around! 

XOXO,

Jessy
p.s. Hi Andrea… You are the best, (and sassiest) nurse I could ever ask for. See you NEXT week! 🙂