The Fabric of Life

Did people talk to each other on public transportation before mobile devices? 
I’m working downtown for my new job and it’s easiest to take the train. Everyday I become more fascinated by how so many individuals can be in one location and nobody talks to each other. Nobody even makes eye contact. Most people are on their phones, texting, listening to music, checking emails, reading. Clearly, many are connecting with other people- just none of the other humans near them. It’s such a weird concept- kind of like being on an elevator – to be sharing, many times, super personal space with another individual but make no connection. Why is that? I’m totally guilty as I listen to my music and people watch. I probably would text or email or go on social media if I could but I’d crush my data in a day so I don’t. As I people watch, it’s interesting to see everyone’s moods, expressions, attitudes. Hundreds of people packing into a single object like a can of sardines most likely to do the same thing- go to work or to go home from work- but rarely is an acknowledgement made.

Even though the vast majority of us are riding the train for the same reason, it’s different than when we go on the train to go to a Celtics game- those rides, there’s a clear sense of comeroddery- we act nice towards others because we know we’re rooting for the same team, we’re doing the same thing- we must be “like each other.” But aren’t we all like each other when we’re going to work too? Just trying to make a few bucks to help put food on the table, a roof over our heads, pay for cable, save up for that vacation, to spoil our pets. 

Since I’m taking the train twice a day now, every time I get on, I think about this concept and it’s been kind of bumming me out. But then I was walking to Sullivan Station one morning and I notice some new graffiti below the underpass. 


“Even though I don’t know you, I need you….. #FabricOfOurLife”

And there it is. I’m not the only one feeling the disconnect with one another. Whoever this person is, they feel it too. 

I’m not sure how long Somerville authorities will keep this one up, but I hope they do for a little while- it made me think. I think it’ll make others think.

We may not know each other but we all need one another. I’m going to remember this before I make eye contact with someone on the train and quickly look away… maybe tomorrow, I take the time to smile. Who knows, that person could use a smile. 

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3 Months in the Making

I haven’t written a blog post since my port was removed. That was March 13.  
I thought that by not writing about cancer or talking about cancer, I wouldn’t think about cancer. But there’s still not a day that goes by that I don’t think about it. To be honest, there’s hardly an hour that goes by without it popping into my mind. 

Is writing like riding a bike?

Can you not write for years and then start back up again- like you never stopped? 

I hope so, cuz I’m ready to start riding again. Wait, I mean writing. 

Four months of being a stay-at-home pup mom brings up a lot of emotions and they varied everyday. One day I would be jacked up when Mike got home, so excited to talk to someone- to a HUMAN! Omg! And then others I’d be down, unable to keep a conversation because I felt so bad about myself. I felt guilty that I didn’t have a job, I wasn’t making money for our family, and that I didn’t have a better direction of where I wanted to go than I did the day before. I over-compensated by trying to do every single household chore one can think of. I became an award-winning chef. I got to spend time with family members that I know I wouldn’t have been able to if I had been working full time. There was so much good that happened in these months yet some days seemed so very difficult, so lonely and sad. What I learned, is that I need some sort of structure, I need to have a purpose, I need to feel part of a team. More than be part but I need to feel like I’m an equal part to the team. It’s essential to my happiness. Without it, I feel unworthy. Whether or not that’s a healthy realization, that’s yet to be determined. But it certainly is true for me. I’ve begun telling myself “I am worthy” during meditation. That’s because I am. But I don’t always believe it. I don’t always believe that I am worthy of this life I have been given- one with many abundances, many positive relationships, and above all, one that is healthy again. Feeling worthy is essential. It’s a piece of life I definitely haven’t mastered but I’m working on. I hope you read this and remind yourself that you’re worthy too. You’re worthy of all the good things that have happened to you, you’re worthy of all the blessings you’ve been given, you’re worthy of this life… your life. 

With that simple post, I feel accomplished and I feel like I can start writing again. I’ve had my down moments in the past 3-4 months but I also have had amazing moments- I’ve gone tubing with my whole family, I’ve helped throw and had my own bridal shower & bachelorette party! I’ve traveled to Vermont, Florida and Austin. I’ve gone on long walks with phoebs on the beach. I watched my baby brother graduate college. I’ve gone to sporting games and concerts. I picked out my WEDDING ring! I’ve done SO much actually now that I’m looking back. And the best part is that new things are happening and there’s so much more to look forward to! I want to remember every bit of it… so it’s time to start documenting!

Happy weekend! Hoping you get to soak up the rays of sun that have finally decided to come out to play! ☀️

Love & light,

Jessy 

The Beauty of Being Blind

To my amazement, over the past year and a half, I’ve continued to receive Smile Cards on a regular basis to take to the Brigham. Sometimes they’re from friends or family but more often than not, they’re from individuals or groups that I’m not associated with or know personally. Upon returning from the Cape on Saturday, I was immediately greeted with two batches of cards from different people. After we unpacked, I started reading thru them and, as I always am, I was moved by the kind words these strangers were writing to patients. But as I was reading through them, my mind wandered to the many tragic events that have unfolded in our country and throughout the world in the past month. It struck me, quite poignantly, that the many children and adults writing these cards don’t know who they’re writing to so they certainly don’t know the patients’ race or religion or gender or sexuality. They just know that they’re a human being. A human being in need of some support and so they selflessly offer their love, prayers and healing thoughts to complete and total strangers.

I wish that we could all see the world like the people who write these smile cards do…blind to the labels society puts on people. Blind to whether or not the person is voting for Hillary or Trump, blind to what kind of car they drive or what God they believe in or whether they’re gay or straight or transgender. They’re blind to it all; all except the fact that there’s a human being on the other end of that card, there’s a human being in a hospital bed that has a family and friends that love them. In the end, isn’t that all we really need to know? A person, just like us, is in need… We should help. 
It’s time we see people truly for the heart that beats within them.
Thank you to every single person who has written a Smile Card over the past year and a half. You’re making the world a more caring place. Keep them coming!
Lots of love & light,

Jessy

So Many Smiles

Over 350 Smile Cards are on route to the Brigham!!!! I have received letters from so many people wanting to help in this small initiative and it makes my heart so full. Keep them coming; there are always patients that need a little pick-me-up! 





Thank you thank you thank you to everyone who has helped me with this. You truly are making a difference.
Lots of love & light,

Jessy 

A Card to Make Me Smile

Last week when I got home from work, I had a letter in the mail from a sender I didn’t know. I opened it and this is what appeared ….

   
“Don’t let anyone dull your sparkle.”

  
A very simple note, from a complete stranger that made me feel so warm inside and gave me energy I didn’t knew I had that day. 

I got my own SmileCard. And you know what?! It worked. I smiled so big and was so touched by someone’s small act of kindness. 

So first of all, thank you to whoever sent this— it’s exactly what I needed. 

Secondly, this inspires me to keep writing cards- they make a difference. If you want to make a difference in someone’s day, write a Smile Card- write a few, whatever comes to you, and send my way (2Webster  St. Somerville, MA 02145). I’ll take them to the hospital- there are ALWAYS patients that need them.

As we start this new week, let’s take from the important of this saying– don’t let anyone or anything dull your sparkle- you have a lot of sparkle so let it shine! 

Lots of love & light,

Jessy 

A Hello Travels A Long Way

I’m walking to work on this still kind-of chilly Monday morning and I was feeling sad that the weekend was over. It was such a good one. But then just as I’m beginning my 2 mile trip, an older man sitting beside an open first-floor window wishes me a “good morning.” This has happened before and each time it does, it completely changes my mood and genuinely makes me so happy! I’m not sure how long he sits there wishing all the walker-bys a good day but for such a simple gesture, it does such good for my soul. 
In general, walking compared to driving, always makes me calmer and there are a lot of reasons why but one of them is the human interaction. So often in cars, we forget that there’s a human in that machine that’s cutting us off. Conversely, you don’t forget a humans a human when their physical body passes by. Typically, you tend to be more compassionate and understanding of whatever it is they may be doing. 
So on this Monday morning, I’m reminding myself and all of you, to be kind to people– kindness doesn’t have to be grand gestures or gifts- it can be a small smile or gentle hello. Make a difference in someone else’s day. The whole world would probably be a little better off and definitely a little happier if everyone remembered to act like the older man in the window this morning.
Have a wonderful week!

Lots of love & light,

Jessy 

Favorite Things

I’ve always been a big Sound of Music fan– the entire movie is just incredible. But this song is the epitome of what makes it’s awesome. It’s so important to remember the little things in life that make us happy so here are a few of my favorite things:

  1. Chatting with Mike in bed after we turn off the lights
  2. Being outdoors and watching the water
  3. Riding waves in the ocean and feeling the salt water splash upon me
  4. Relaxing with family and friends
  5. Feeling sunshine hit my face
  6. Being in shavasana after a hard yoga session
  7. Getting back scratchies
  8. Sitting in a hot tub
  9. Getting kisses from Phoebe
  10. Reading in bed
  11. Listening to my niece laugh and watching her dance

What are some things that make you happy? Deep down to your core happy?

I bet you just thinking of a few of these things will make you smile.

Lots of love & light,

Jessy